Black Friday. I always work it.
Staggeringly different this year. No crowds, at least not really. Periods of time being able to walk away from the register. Hardly ran out of anything so no need to worry about rain checks. Periods of time only running one register. Boring. Employees were sent HOME....that's NEVER happened before.
Oh, don't get me wrong. $47,000 worth of business in one day never happens at that store. But we were busier last year and people didn't even know the store was there. Our store plan was $68,000. Meaning, the company projected that it would at least be as busy as last year with hopes to do more business.
Why did it fail?
The ad. It's boring. It has been virtually the same for the five years I have worked for the company. It really never changes. How many chainsaws, leather boots, gun safes, and air compressors does one person really need over that period of time? The biggest business we did was for things that people need or want every day. Such as black oil sunflower seed and softener salt. I think if the company offered more sales on things like horse, chicken and dog feed, we'd have done much better. People need those things. Feeds are high right now.
Our marketing department. The ads are so globbed together and unexciting that hell, just from looking at it, I'm bored. I can't imagine a customer being excited over it.
Our buyers. There is clothing in the ad...but the buyers who buy the clothing must be blind. I can't imagine wearing most of it. Oh, the men's clothing is fine. It's the women's clothing. It is geared to ladies of a certain age and ten year olds. Since most of the female population is neither....a huge chunk of the market is missing. I know I wouldn't buy a damn thing in that clothing department right now unless it was a Carhartt hoodie or something like that. The fabrics are also at fault...they are so thin that if you get cold, everyone will know...and the fit is at fault...manufactured in China (like every thing is now) where boob sizes must be smaller, the sleeves start too close too the shoulder and the boobs have no room, making the smallest person with any boobs at all look dumpy.
The shift to major retailers being open Thanksgiving night. By the time we opened Friday morning at 6 am...and did NO business until 7 am, everyone was either sleeping or had spent all their money.
I also wonder about the ads getting mailed out on time. At our particular location, we have had at least 100 customers on prior ads come in complaining that the ad wasn't in their mailbox until it had ended. My previous manager (we are currently manager-less) honored the ad to make them happy. I believe this could be the case again...but could be wrong since a friend whose daughter works at a different location also said it was slow there...and that store is easily 100 percent busier on a normal day than ours.
The store was quite immaculate when we left last night. And we left nearly an hour earlier than we were supposed to leave. That has never ever happened. On a proper Black Friday, the store will be thrashed for at least a week before it is borderline back in shape, because from here on out, TSC basically does an ad per week to get rid of the Christmas items hopefully before they go to ridiculous clearance prices.
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On another note, I am told we will now be borrowing an ASM from Whitmore Lake until the first of the year. First it was for a week, then until the first of December, and now, until January. I kind of think he is going to be our manager. Sounds like the TSC way...sneak someone in, get them and us used to the situation and then, make the announcement. I don't really care. He's okay, doesn't pick on me, but then, I do my job...but others have taken up arms against him because he gets after them to work hard. I have tried explaining that its because he worked with Cindy who worked with Janet and so they both were perfectionist taskmasters...and that is how the job is supposed to be done. He just is rubbing people the wrong way right now because he's going about it incorrectly. Oh well. Not my problem. I have no problem with it...I also worked with Janet and Cindy. I'm used to it.
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Day of Purgatory: Part the Second
I knew there was trouble the instant we arrived at the mother in laws...no available workspace in which to prepare food. Ummm? What? We piled crap everywhere to make room and then had to take the garbage out. Can't really blame her, she worked until 2 am then got up and cleaned the house...vacuuming and such.
And then we had to cook.
What a horrible, waste of a day. Six hours later, I am home.
Just for starters, if attending a family event, don't ask questions if you aren't prepared to handle the answers. One of the attendees was Jon's cousin Whatsername. She decided to ask probing questions after noticing that I was not fawning over her not so cute walking baby. In fact, I was looking over its head wondering why the hell these people were blocking my view of Looney Tunes which was on the television because I had no interest in them at all, having met them before and found them boring.
Whatsername asked why we don't have kids.
I said it was because I hate them.
She was taken aback, but just had to keep digging away. "Well, why?"
"I don't know," I said. "I just always have. Even when I was a kid myself." Feeling insulted, I added, "I'd rather blow my own brains out than raise a poo making spawn that is basically a human parasite for at least 18 years."
I know this struck a nerve particularly because Whatsername might just have turned 18. She has an 18 month old. Dropped out of high school. Is sponging off her parents and the State of Michigan and so is her Baby Daddy. Yep. They are BOTH unemployed spongers that are getting money for bringing a life into the world accidentally. I already knew the back story here...figured I may as well insult her since she'd already insulted me.
Nosy bitch.
And still, this wasn't enough.
Whatsername asked, "Do you have siblings that have children?"
"Oh yes," I said, "my brother now has a 6 or 7 month old. He's dead to me now. I probably won't really see him again until its moved out of their house." I was quiet for a moment before adding, "he really didn't want kids either, you see...but now he has one. But at least now that he has one, he takes care of it." (Not all of this is exactly the truth, but ask rude questions, get lies.)
Whatsername finally decided she'd had enough and left me alone. I kind of wondered where she went because its a small house and there was nowhere to run or I'd have run away long before...just to be less crowded.
What she did was run to Jon and tell him that I hate kids like this was broadcast news. He's known me for five years. Three years before we got married and two years since. He knew I didn't like kids for three years before our wedding. He thought it an odd statement until I told him she'd pissed me off and what I'd been saying to her. Then he laughed and said he didn't care what I said to "that skank."
We left all our stuff there. Jon says he'll get it tomorrow. It's the first holiday meal that I've gone home hungry. I made soup. It was the only edible thing. Green bean casserole: wheat. Stuffing: more wheat. Pies: wheat, wheat, wheat. Mashed potatoes: not wheat, but I don't like them really. Turkey, yuck. Ham, kind of yuck, but better than turkey...just depends who is cutting off the gross fatty bits. So I am still hungry. Rather be hungry than pissed off all damn day. I couldn't get drunk enough to NOT be angry and claustrophic. I really think the anger voids the alcohol's effectiveness.
The only people I could stand: Jon, his sister's family, and Jon's parents, and a guy named Tommy. Everyone else could fall off the face of the earth and the world would probably be a better place. I am not doing this next year. No amount of guilt, no amount of tears is getting me to go through this charade again. I'd rather stay home, eat a gluten free pizza, or whatever...and at least enjoy the day.
And then we had to cook.
What a horrible, waste of a day. Six hours later, I am home.
Just for starters, if attending a family event, don't ask questions if you aren't prepared to handle the answers. One of the attendees was Jon's cousin Whatsername. She decided to ask probing questions after noticing that I was not fawning over her not so cute walking baby. In fact, I was looking over its head wondering why the hell these people were blocking my view of Looney Tunes which was on the television because I had no interest in them at all, having met them before and found them boring.
Whatsername asked why we don't have kids.
I said it was because I hate them.
She was taken aback, but just had to keep digging away. "Well, why?"
"I don't know," I said. "I just always have. Even when I was a kid myself." Feeling insulted, I added, "I'd rather blow my own brains out than raise a poo making spawn that is basically a human parasite for at least 18 years."
I know this struck a nerve particularly because Whatsername might just have turned 18. She has an 18 month old. Dropped out of high school. Is sponging off her parents and the State of Michigan and so is her Baby Daddy. Yep. They are BOTH unemployed spongers that are getting money for bringing a life into the world accidentally. I already knew the back story here...figured I may as well insult her since she'd already insulted me.
Nosy bitch.
And still, this wasn't enough.
Whatsername asked, "Do you have siblings that have children?"
"Oh yes," I said, "my brother now has a 6 or 7 month old. He's dead to me now. I probably won't really see him again until its moved out of their house." I was quiet for a moment before adding, "he really didn't want kids either, you see...but now he has one. But at least now that he has one, he takes care of it." (Not all of this is exactly the truth, but ask rude questions, get lies.)
Whatsername finally decided she'd had enough and left me alone. I kind of wondered where she went because its a small house and there was nowhere to run or I'd have run away long before...just to be less crowded.
What she did was run to Jon and tell him that I hate kids like this was broadcast news. He's known me for five years. Three years before we got married and two years since. He knew I didn't like kids for three years before our wedding. He thought it an odd statement until I told him she'd pissed me off and what I'd been saying to her. Then he laughed and said he didn't care what I said to "that skank."
We left all our stuff there. Jon says he'll get it tomorrow. It's the first holiday meal that I've gone home hungry. I made soup. It was the only edible thing. Green bean casserole: wheat. Stuffing: more wheat. Pies: wheat, wheat, wheat. Mashed potatoes: not wheat, but I don't like them really. Turkey, yuck. Ham, kind of yuck, but better than turkey...just depends who is cutting off the gross fatty bits. So I am still hungry. Rather be hungry than pissed off all damn day. I couldn't get drunk enough to NOT be angry and claustrophic. I really think the anger voids the alcohol's effectiveness.
The only people I could stand: Jon, his sister's family, and Jon's parents, and a guy named Tommy. Everyone else could fall off the face of the earth and the world would probably be a better place. I am not doing this next year. No amount of guilt, no amount of tears is getting me to go through this charade again. I'd rather stay home, eat a gluten free pizza, or whatever...and at least enjoy the day.
Day of Purgatory: Part the First
So far on this day of purgatory I have only managed three hours of sleep in between nightmares of recovering the store and front facing the store. For those of you who don't know what this means, it means eternally cleaning up after slobs who will hopefully buy things and spend money, but whose sole joy in life seems to be relocating objects and in general thrashing the store instead of buying things. Dreaming about work annoyed me enough that I was unable to return to sleep.
And then, when I decided, at 6 am, that I would like to try to go back to sleep...Fat Kitty decided to yowl for breakfast. She never gets fed until at least 8 or 9...or 10 at the latest so I am not sure why she randomly decided that she must sporadically yowl for two hours while I am trying to sleep on my day off.
Vincent the Bunny then decided it was time for his morning laps and bunny play time. Usually I am able to sleep through this, since he is the quietest furry friend in the house but with all the yowling...um, no.
Then it started, snores that could be heard on the next block. I tried rolling Jon over, poking and prodding him, but to no avail. The snoring would not stop.
Doggles decided to whine at me because he wanted out. Oh, no, now the damn dogs are in on the conspiracy!
So I gave up. I got up, let the dogs out. Fed the cats at a normal time. And wondered why all the things were so annoying this morning.
Then I remembered today was Thanksgiving. Yep. It's a holiday I seldom enjoy, if ever. Full of have-tos and grouchy bloated people. The day where I am usually only thankful for leaving the meal at a place I didn't want to go but was somehow tricked by guilt and the promise of free food and so got myself into the hum-drum situation in the first place.
And, yet again, I have been guilted into a dinner at a place where I don't want to spend more than an hour. That should always be my first clue. Just say no to dinners at places that make you uncomfortable. Yes, I know its dinner...and free food...but just say no. But the mother in law crying about how its her birthday AND Thanksgiving made me agree. Did I mention she has recently become mentally unstable? So, I am not much looking forward to any of the events that will be happening today.
This will be Jon's family's first Thanksgiving without their Mom/Mother-in-law/Aunt/Grandma Helen. And Jon's dad is cooking....Jon is worried about that. He said he's going to have to help, but he's still sleeping. This sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
To be Continued after the dinner....
And then, when I decided, at 6 am, that I would like to try to go back to sleep...Fat Kitty decided to yowl for breakfast. She never gets fed until at least 8 or 9...or 10 at the latest so I am not sure why she randomly decided that she must sporadically yowl for two hours while I am trying to sleep on my day off.
Vincent the Bunny then decided it was time for his morning laps and bunny play time. Usually I am able to sleep through this, since he is the quietest furry friend in the house but with all the yowling...um, no.
Then it started, snores that could be heard on the next block. I tried rolling Jon over, poking and prodding him, but to no avail. The snoring would not stop.
Doggles decided to whine at me because he wanted out. Oh, no, now the damn dogs are in on the conspiracy!
So I gave up. I got up, let the dogs out. Fed the cats at a normal time. And wondered why all the things were so annoying this morning.
Then I remembered today was Thanksgiving. Yep. It's a holiday I seldom enjoy, if ever. Full of have-tos and grouchy bloated people. The day where I am usually only thankful for leaving the meal at a place I didn't want to go but was somehow tricked by guilt and the promise of free food and so got myself into the hum-drum situation in the first place.
And, yet again, I have been guilted into a dinner at a place where I don't want to spend more than an hour. That should always be my first clue. Just say no to dinners at places that make you uncomfortable. Yes, I know its dinner...and free food...but just say no. But the mother in law crying about how its her birthday AND Thanksgiving made me agree. Did I mention she has recently become mentally unstable? So, I am not much looking forward to any of the events that will be happening today.
This will be Jon's family's first Thanksgiving without their Mom/Mother-in-law/Aunt/Grandma Helen. And Jon's dad is cooking....Jon is worried about that. He said he's going to have to help, but he's still sleeping. This sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
To be Continued after the dinner....
Sunday, November 18, 2012
The bad kind of excitement
This week was full of...excitement...the bad kind.
I learned, only because of Jon's friend Levon, that an acquaintance had been beaten in his own home, dragged a mile down the road an executed because someone owed him $10,000. Okay, I know this wasn't exactly a stand up citizen and I also didn't particularly like him, but am upset and disturbed that this happened so near our house. I was equally upset that Jon had no plans to enlighten me even though he and Levon had apparently located the story on the internet and a friend of theirs had attended the funeral. I, however, can not find the news story. Maybe it is my natural ineptness with research, I don't know. I do know that I suck equally at resume writing probably because I hate logical past times.
Our laptop took a fatal fall. I was much less upset about losing the laptop than violent crime so near the house, understandably. We have since remedied the problem by buying a new one which appears more durable. It was cheaper than the original anyway. Computers and televisions, they keep getting cheaper. He chose an older model because he prefers Windows 7. I told him get whatever he likes. I really only use the computer to pay bills and for recreational use like keeping in touch with family five hours away and lustfully shopping for things I don't need or cannot afford.
Jon's Jeep was broken into and thrashed while it sat in front of our house. They took his prescription safety glasses, of all things. His eyes are so bad I think anyone else wearing them would walk off a freeway overpass without realizing. Luckily, he found them abandoned on the next street over. It's agitating. The damn Jeep doesn't lock because of rust issues...it is old and well-traveled...but there wasn't a damn thing in it worth more than those glasses...and only worth a lot to one person.
My friend's father in law was in a bad car accident. The truck is undriveable but he is okay. He is a nice man.
Today, however, has been pretty great. We ate at the Indian restraunt Ruth and Joe found. Mmmmm, tasty. And we went to a couple of antique malls. We ended up putting a wild orange high back chair on layaway to be picked up after Jon gets paid next Friday. It was $100 but is sturdy and sits really really nice. It's worth it. People don't make furniture that solid anymore. I think it may be from the late 60s or the 70s sometime. Not really good with dating furniture of that age. But, it will look nice with my wall color. The plan is to search for a second chair, and a small table to set between them and get rid of the smelly couch Shane gave us. Emma (our dog) who sometimes believes she is a kitty, stands on the back of the overly poofed couch to bark at people and has made a lot of the stitching let loose. I don't care because the thing smells weird...like rank body odor sometimes and has ever since we've had it.
I learned, only because of Jon's friend Levon, that an acquaintance had been beaten in his own home, dragged a mile down the road an executed because someone owed him $10,000. Okay, I know this wasn't exactly a stand up citizen and I also didn't particularly like him, but am upset and disturbed that this happened so near our house. I was equally upset that Jon had no plans to enlighten me even though he and Levon had apparently located the story on the internet and a friend of theirs had attended the funeral. I, however, can not find the news story. Maybe it is my natural ineptness with research, I don't know. I do know that I suck equally at resume writing probably because I hate logical past times.
Our laptop took a fatal fall. I was much less upset about losing the laptop than violent crime so near the house, understandably. We have since remedied the problem by buying a new one which appears more durable. It was cheaper than the original anyway. Computers and televisions, they keep getting cheaper. He chose an older model because he prefers Windows 7. I told him get whatever he likes. I really only use the computer to pay bills and for recreational use like keeping in touch with family five hours away and lustfully shopping for things I don't need or cannot afford.
Jon's Jeep was broken into and thrashed while it sat in front of our house. They took his prescription safety glasses, of all things. His eyes are so bad I think anyone else wearing them would walk off a freeway overpass without realizing. Luckily, he found them abandoned on the next street over. It's agitating. The damn Jeep doesn't lock because of rust issues...it is old and well-traveled...but there wasn't a damn thing in it worth more than those glasses...and only worth a lot to one person.
My friend's father in law was in a bad car accident. The truck is undriveable but he is okay. He is a nice man.
Today, however, has been pretty great. We ate at the Indian restraunt Ruth and Joe found. Mmmmm, tasty. And we went to a couple of antique malls. We ended up putting a wild orange high back chair on layaway to be picked up after Jon gets paid next Friday. It was $100 but is sturdy and sits really really nice. It's worth it. People don't make furniture that solid anymore. I think it may be from the late 60s or the 70s sometime. Not really good with dating furniture of that age. But, it will look nice with my wall color. The plan is to search for a second chair, and a small table to set between them and get rid of the smelly couch Shane gave us. Emma (our dog) who sometimes believes she is a kitty, stands on the back of the overly poofed couch to bark at people and has made a lot of the stitching let loose. I don't care because the thing smells weird...like rank body odor sometimes and has ever since we've had it.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Greedy oil companies
News from the tiny corner of the world where I grew up:
Fracking
One of the 28 permits the article alludes to belongs to my grandfather. And, yes, they are paying them some type of money...but it will never be enough since this process pollutes ground water and possibly raises the risk of cancer. The oil companies deny such clams...but since when has pumping chemical waste water into the ground ever been advisable in the history of the world?
This is Fracking
And this is the permit for my grandfather's land
My grandfather is ignorant and all about the almighty dollar. Always has been. So he gave his permission. My parents purchased some land from him because, well, they wanted an acre, and because of this, they were entitled to some compensation, not much (considering their quality of life is going to be disrupted) and they are powerless to stop this from happening simply because they own land bordering his. So they decided to opt for some monetary compensation instead of none. Even though their water may become undrinkable.
Fracking
One of the 28 permits the article alludes to belongs to my grandfather. And, yes, they are paying them some type of money...but it will never be enough since this process pollutes ground water and possibly raises the risk of cancer. The oil companies deny such clams...but since when has pumping chemical waste water into the ground ever been advisable in the history of the world?
This is Fracking
And this is the permit for my grandfather's land
My grandfather is ignorant and all about the almighty dollar. Always has been. So he gave his permission. My parents purchased some land from him because, well, they wanted an acre, and because of this, they were entitled to some compensation, not much (considering their quality of life is going to be disrupted) and they are powerless to stop this from happening simply because they own land bordering his. So they decided to opt for some monetary compensation instead of none. Even though their water may become undrinkable.
Sunday, November 4, 2012
This Week's Featured Neuroses
I am not sure how I feel about life right now. Strange things have been happening all week. For instance a friend of Jon's father told us our sewer pipe was broken at the city line. We borrowed some money from the credit union and got a second opinion. The second opinion says that its not broken and we are fine. But, since we borrowed money and basically will owe the interest we are going to repair the water lines. So living in the house for three years with a trickle of cold water in the kitchen sink, only hot water for the washing machine, and only hot water for the shower, that will be interesting. I just have to figure out what day this guy is coming out and unless its going to be on my day off I will have to arrange for Ruth to maybe come and hang out at the house.
So I've managed four loads of laundry and still need to wash the bedding. And the dishes. I also think I need to buy crappy toilet paper. Somehow the pipe always plugs in the same place. I think Jon is using wayyyy too much toilet paper. It's my only explanation. So weird. We don't flush anything down there that isn't the usual. No tampons...no weird objects. I just don't understand why its been such an issue the past six months or so.
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I think Jon's mother needs a therapist. He said she texted him this week and told him that she was going to miss a mortgage payment but that it was okay because God would somehow magically help them pay the bills. (She's donated $1,000 to some televangelist.) I fail to see how her donating $1,000 that she needs to pay her bills will buy God's favor. I don't believe in God but I especially don't believe you could bribe God with money if there was a God. I really think she's gone mental.
So Jon took the money he had saved for a new pair of shoes (the ones he is wearing have holes in the soles...and they are his only shoes) and took his Dad out to a bar where apparently male-bonding time was spent as they drank beer and ate dinner and his Dad wasted $80 on a poker machine trying to win back some of the money that she donated.
I think she flipped when her mother in law died. I really do. No one in this dysfunctional family has mourned properly as far as I am concerned...they've ignored it...they've pushed it aside, they've tried to do all the everyday things that normal people do and they're failing radically. Jon's dad hasn't been the same at all either. I should probably go talk to her. But I don't want to. I'm not going to be able to help. I just listen to her complain about her life and having no money and that her car is going to die and how Bob treats her...and how her house isn't the way she wants....and am powerless to change it FOR her. SHE has the power. Not ME.
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I have a friend with similar marital issues. Her self-esteem is just so horrifically low that she allows her husband to make her feel insignificant and ugly. Far from it. She's quite attractive and has a fun, interesting personality. I love her a lot.
I have been trying to alter her thought processes by introducing somewhat radical (to her) ideas. Such as weighing herself every morning isn't healthy because it makes her feel fat so she should just throw away the scale and just try to eat healthy and BE healthy. Weight is just a number, like age. It only matters if you let it. I explained that I don't own a scale because I had issues with it myself as a teenager.
Her husband tells her she's fat and that he wants her to be thin, like when they met. Guess its no secret that I don't like him. Conditional love is for shallow, useless people. I think she could do better but since she's been married to him for 16 years its a habit and she's frightened of change.
I tried explaining that life is short. If something is making her miserable, than it shouldn't be in her life. Such as me being angry at Jon for using a million water glasses when one washed out would do, so I broke lots of them and got rid of lots of dishes because instead of washing them, he'd just dirty EVERY DISH, PAN, and BOWL we owned and I would end up resentful and angry because I'd have to wash them all. I got it down to the basics and that's what I can live with and he, after his initial anger, tried suggesting this approach to his parents who apparently have the same problem because it worked for us!
I'll see what she makes of it. She's clearly been brain-washed by mainstream America. I really hope my eccentricity rubs off, if only a little.
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And then there is my brain chemistry. I have no idea what has been going on up there. But I feel like a train wreck. I want to laugh, cry, and yell angrily all within the space of a few minutes. It is NOT PMS this time. I don't know what it is. It's miserable. It's also brought my insomnia back which is exacerbating the problem. Sleeping 4-5 hours a night just doesn't cut it. I want to sleep. I just can't for various reasons including mind on overdrive, clogged sinuses, headaches and the like.
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Another one of the long-term residents of our neighborhood moved away. Why? Because they have money and more and more poor people are moving in. Undesirables. Crime on the rise. I can't blame them, I just envy them. I want to do the same thing. Just don't know how in the hell we'll ever afford it.
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On the upside we did meet our friends Ruth and Joe for lunch at a fantastic Indian restrurant that was previously unknown to us. The food was delicious and the place was packed. But no one minded waiting their turns for a table.
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Work has been atrocious. I hate people. I have to really work to not make snarky comments at the customers. I so want to ask the bitchy, pony tailed customer if loosening her pony tail improves her mood because I think its such a tight pony tail that it makes her a bitch. I want to ask people with horrible children if natural selection wouldn't be a good option for them since they are letting them run wild anyway. I want to ask that constantly drunk man with the tiny dog in his arms if its easier to read packages BEFORE he's so trashed the words swim and to please not breathe in my personal space. There are a thousand things I'd love to do to get fired....only I can't afford to be fired.
So I've managed four loads of laundry and still need to wash the bedding. And the dishes. I also think I need to buy crappy toilet paper. Somehow the pipe always plugs in the same place. I think Jon is using wayyyy too much toilet paper. It's my only explanation. So weird. We don't flush anything down there that isn't the usual. No tampons...no weird objects. I just don't understand why its been such an issue the past six months or so.
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I think Jon's mother needs a therapist. He said she texted him this week and told him that she was going to miss a mortgage payment but that it was okay because God would somehow magically help them pay the bills. (She's donated $1,000 to some televangelist.) I fail to see how her donating $1,000 that she needs to pay her bills will buy God's favor. I don't believe in God but I especially don't believe you could bribe God with money if there was a God. I really think she's gone mental.
So Jon took the money he had saved for a new pair of shoes (the ones he is wearing have holes in the soles...and they are his only shoes) and took his Dad out to a bar where apparently male-bonding time was spent as they drank beer and ate dinner and his Dad wasted $80 on a poker machine trying to win back some of the money that she donated.
I think she flipped when her mother in law died. I really do. No one in this dysfunctional family has mourned properly as far as I am concerned...they've ignored it...they've pushed it aside, they've tried to do all the everyday things that normal people do and they're failing radically. Jon's dad hasn't been the same at all either. I should probably go talk to her. But I don't want to. I'm not going to be able to help. I just listen to her complain about her life and having no money and that her car is going to die and how Bob treats her...and how her house isn't the way she wants....and am powerless to change it FOR her. SHE has the power. Not ME.
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I have a friend with similar marital issues. Her self-esteem is just so horrifically low that she allows her husband to make her feel insignificant and ugly. Far from it. She's quite attractive and has a fun, interesting personality. I love her a lot.
I have been trying to alter her thought processes by introducing somewhat radical (to her) ideas. Such as weighing herself every morning isn't healthy because it makes her feel fat so she should just throw away the scale and just try to eat healthy and BE healthy. Weight is just a number, like age. It only matters if you let it. I explained that I don't own a scale because I had issues with it myself as a teenager.
Her husband tells her she's fat and that he wants her to be thin, like when they met. Guess its no secret that I don't like him. Conditional love is for shallow, useless people. I think she could do better but since she's been married to him for 16 years its a habit and she's frightened of change.
I tried explaining that life is short. If something is making her miserable, than it shouldn't be in her life. Such as me being angry at Jon for using a million water glasses when one washed out would do, so I broke lots of them and got rid of lots of dishes because instead of washing them, he'd just dirty EVERY DISH, PAN, and BOWL we owned and I would end up resentful and angry because I'd have to wash them all. I got it down to the basics and that's what I can live with and he, after his initial anger, tried suggesting this approach to his parents who apparently have the same problem because it worked for us!
I'll see what she makes of it. She's clearly been brain-washed by mainstream America. I really hope my eccentricity rubs off, if only a little.
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And then there is my brain chemistry. I have no idea what has been going on up there. But I feel like a train wreck. I want to laugh, cry, and yell angrily all within the space of a few minutes. It is NOT PMS this time. I don't know what it is. It's miserable. It's also brought my insomnia back which is exacerbating the problem. Sleeping 4-5 hours a night just doesn't cut it. I want to sleep. I just can't for various reasons including mind on overdrive, clogged sinuses, headaches and the like.
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Another one of the long-term residents of our neighborhood moved away. Why? Because they have money and more and more poor people are moving in. Undesirables. Crime on the rise. I can't blame them, I just envy them. I want to do the same thing. Just don't know how in the hell we'll ever afford it.
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On the upside we did meet our friends Ruth and Joe for lunch at a fantastic Indian restrurant that was previously unknown to us. The food was delicious and the place was packed. But no one minded waiting their turns for a table.
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Work has been atrocious. I hate people. I have to really work to not make snarky comments at the customers. I so want to ask the bitchy, pony tailed customer if loosening her pony tail improves her mood because I think its such a tight pony tail that it makes her a bitch. I want to ask people with horrible children if natural selection wouldn't be a good option for them since they are letting them run wild anyway. I want to ask that constantly drunk man with the tiny dog in his arms if its easier to read packages BEFORE he's so trashed the words swim and to please not breathe in my personal space. There are a thousand things I'd love to do to get fired....only I can't afford to be fired.
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